you know you are missing someone when unconsciously you take on their words in speech/writing

sometimes all that's required to destroy someone or something is a whisper. a vilely, poisonous whisper into the right ears at the right time. to do this one needs to have an inimical sense of destiny & a willingness to pay the price. a forced death, albeit on the non-physical, is violence still. it's very sly actually. it requires an almost psychic knowledge of the victim. once you know, the action takes only a whisper. beware of such people. especially those who wield this power with great self-restraint. also once you walk this road there's no turning back.

keep it simple stupid (k.i.s.s) is probably the oldest cliche around. like in college i developed on my innate ability to complicate things. low self-esteem ensured i remained on this road of being special. simple essays on macbeth had me ruminating about para-psychology and the third dimension. needless to say my grades remained unremarkable. and consistently i worked on remaining outside of reality by trying to examine its extensions & probabilities. the real world scared me. and slowly i built a schizophrenic half-real world. now am queen of my half-deluded world. ensnared, unrelenting, proud & defeated. time to re-learn perhaps.

Jane was, and is, a very shy person: one of her favourite expressions is, "Photographers should neither be seen nor heard."
- The Guardian

Words of Jane Bown. Brilliant photographer who refused to use artificial lights or make her subjects pose. And hesitantly she believed her pictures told the truth.

Am just starting with photography. something that has persistently lurked in my conscious. i did a short course in photography in 1999 and since then gave in to procrastination. now that there's a camera here's list of things i want to work at - low lights, b&w largely, portraits & obscurity. glad to have come across jane bown therefore. links to her gallery:
gallery 1
gallery 2

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here's an interesting read from David Levi Strauss essay on images & democracy. taken from a blog called (notes on) politics, theory & photography. this is maintained by a blogger called Jim, a political theorist.

essay:
Click Here to Disappear: Thoughts on Images and Democracy

my take: internet may have made information ubiquitous & the user less involved in critical studies. but has it taken away from democracy? i don't think so. it has empowered everybody. as egotistic as it sounds, critical thinking has often been the pleasure of a few. so have we really trenched ourselves from an imaginary history Strauss proposes? still Strauss' essay is well written & often anti-Panglossian (the pro of which he seems to abhor).

i know there are many who would sign off thomas friedman and his opinions on globalization. in a video interview with The New York Times, he mentions that increase in crude oil prices will encourage developed nations to find alternative sources of energy. and these nations should with this goal lead the way for the developing nations. note tho that this is in contradiction to his first rule of petropolitics - the price of oil and the pace of freedom are indirectly proportional. is he advising his country to continue with its veil-freedom propaganda as long as it leads to a better future? confusing. is the intent here merely to sensationalize or create new trends - eco-energy/ eco-focus?

its interesting how food is used to build bridges or cross barriers. like the chief of India operations (an American) who brings cinnamon rolls made by his mom for people at work. to a group of people who are more comfortable with their gulab jamuns & rasgullas. they bite into this roll to get a taste of cinnamon & caramelized walnuts. its different yet strangely pleasing. it's as if very quickly and quite cheaply we got a taste of a different culture. in the larger context, it's interesting to note that globalization has made it easier to get across cultures. as long as this does not make our world a too small a place with specious agendas of homogenizing local cultures.

'act like a girl'

some people think there's space only for them. their words & thoughts. the world is otherwise crowded with unintelligent chatter. its the same of self-elevated execs. they have difficulty to comprehend a world beyond the geography of their goals. and it shows in what they say. they don't have a word to describe you. so they stick to familiar language, culture - darkies, browns, you (to all within a frame). polite indifference. diffused anger. deliberate agression. like the guy who came riding wildly on his two wheeler at us on the wrong side of the lane without headlights, honking rudely. i said - fuck you, switch on the headlights. he stopped his bike mid-lane and told me to talk like a girl.

Truth is nothing needs to have an emotional influence. Everything can be objectively scrutinized without letting the horror or the pain of the experience shaping our thinking. Or our everyday lives. It is important to know. But only a rational mind can see clearly and make practical solutions. The keywords perhaps are ‘objective self awareness’.

to find a way about rage. to gain belief. to discipline the mind.